Saturday, 1 January 2011

New Year’s Eve





The city was alive New Year's Eve, with lots of hot boys all heading somewhere. Chatty, sexy, full of bravado. Sexy wog boys in tight jeans. Everybody was happy, laughing, smiling. The girls were hot, they looked the part.

Cam and I had our heads on swivels.

We caught a tram and we didn't have to pay, a New Years Eve special. Not that I usually pay, oh, it’s only ever a couple of stops, one of the advantages of living just outside the free tram zone. The tram was loud and packed. It seemed bright, lively, and heading some place for the night. We felt like a gang, a part of a gang and without talking we were all out with each other, even if we didn't acknowledge each other, specifically.

Cam’s mum and dad have retired to a life on the sea. Their boat was moored in Victoria Harbour one boat from the end of the bay right next to the barge that was to let off the fireworks. 

I drank champagne and I'm not paying today, amazingly. Champagne, I mean it's a girl's drink, it usually makes me giddy and weak. It usually gives me a head ache and needing to lie down. Beer is the gay drink, all those straight boys would be surprised. What I mean, of course, is that gay boys have taken to it like they take to cock.

Everybody was happy, laughing, smiling, looking for a good time.

Cam’s mum turned on the food, of course, she laid it on, sea food, caviar, chicken platters, meat, salads of all kind, all laid out. Pavlova and cheese cake and fruit salad for dessert and champagne and wine and beer, as much as you could drink and eat, all laid out on the main deck. 

I’m guessing she didn’t prepare it herself.

They had their ‘boat friends’ on board. The boaty set, they are a particular type. There was lots of gold jewellery.

They parents, the friends and the food were in what I would call the middle section.

Cam’s sister Elli and her boyfriend Gabriel were also on board with a couple of friends, Mark and Stephanie, they sat up on the top deck for most of the night. We could hear them oo’ing and ah’ing as the fireworks exploded over head.

Cam and I sat in the sunken bow section, with lots of cushions. It was lovely, lying back on the plus cushions on the deck of the huge boat, it was like we had a wide screen TV to the celebrations as we lay in our private bed.

There was also First Mate Mike. What can I say about First Mate Mike? The white boaty pants he was wearing showed off his ‘assets’ to perfection.

Cam and I slipped around to the back of the boat where it was quiet and we smoked a splif. We sat back and enjoyed the relative quiet and when we were feeling good and stoned, Cam said, “Let’s smoke another one.”

“Sure, okay.”

“Have you ever said no to a joint?” asked Cam.

“Ah, um. What do you mean?”

“I’ll take that as a no.”

First Mate Mike caught us smoking the second joint, coming around to the back of the boat to see if we were okay. Not only that, I had my hand down Cam’s pants.

“Um, er?” First Mate Mike appeared along the starboard walkway, I think is what they call it. I could be wrong.”

I pulled my hand out of Cam’s pants.

“You guy’s okay?” asked First Mate Mike.

“Yeah, sure,” said Cam. “I’m good.”

I could see First Mate Mike try to stop himself from smiling, which, I gather meant, he saw where my hand was.

“Yes,” I said. My head was thick, my eyelids were heavy.

“Okay, just thought I’d check,” said Mike. There was just the very slightest hint of hesitation on Mike’s part. He just lingered a little.

“Stay,” said Cam. “Here, do you smoke.”

“Oh, I don’t think I can, your mum and dad and all.”

“They won’t care, it’s New Year’s Eve, Mike.”

“Your mum and dad won’t care?”

“No. They used to smoke it too,” said Cam. “Although, I don’t think they smoke it anymore.”

“I would never have picked that,” said Mike.

“Who do you think gave me my first joint?” said Cam. “And the joint after that, and the joint after that, and the joint after that…”

“I think we get it Cam.”

“Your dad?” asked Mike.

“Yeah, I’m sure it was some kind of new age bonding thing.”

Well, piggy one and piggy two had polished off the joint while we were discussing Mike partaking, so Cam took out a fresh one and lit it, then handed it to Mike.

Mike looked nervous, adorably so. 

“Go on,” said Cam. He was clearly stoned as he was obviously turning onto Mike in a dirty pot induced flirt. “Don’t worry, we won’t let anything happen to you.” That sentence was pregnant with lust.

And it was as if I was sucked into the marijuana sexual tension society. “You’re a big, strong boy,” it came out of my mouth before I could stop myself, “you’ll be fine.”

“Yeah, take a set.” Cam patted the seat next to us like a paedophile might pat a park bench for a 13 year old.

“Relax,” I said. In my mind I was saying take your pants off.

I have no idea what two faces Mike saw gazing up at him.

He sat down and took the joint out of Cam’s hand.


“So, how are you?” asked Cam.

Mike has puffed on the joint and was handing it back to us. 

“I’m good,” said Mike.

“Have a few more puffs, we’re already stoned,” said Cam.

“I don’t usually had that much.”

“Go on, it’s New Year,” said Cam.

Mike took a few more puffs.

“Are you a long way from home for New Year’s Eve,” I asked.

Mike hands me the joint, couching a little as he exhales. “I live in Sydney.”

I puff on the joint. “Oh, okay.” I hand it to Cam.

“Don’t cough, don’t get off,” said Cam. He hands the joint back to Mike.

Mike laughs. “No. That’s what they say, isn’t it.”

“Do you have a girlfriend?” I asked.

Mike exhales. “No, I don’t have a girlfriend.” He tries to hand the joint back to Cam.

“Single and live in Sydney,” said Cam. “You smoke the rest of it, we’re pretty stoned.”

“What are do you live in Sydney,” I asked. Mike tries to hand the joint back to me.

“I live in Darlinghurst.”

“You won’t be safe if we smoke anymore.”

Mike made big eyes, but couldn’t help but smile.

Cam made sucking in air sounds.

“I bet you are popular in Darlinghurst,” I said.

“You guys,” said Mike.

“How’s dating in Darlinghurst,” asked Cam.

“Oh, yeah, okay. But I am out on boats most of the time.”

“So, you don’t often get…” said Cam

“Any kind of relief,” I continued.

Mike puffed the last on the joint. “You guys are really funny.”

“We’re good funny, I hope,” said Cam.

“We’re just messing with you,” I said.

“Yeah, you are making me laugh.” Then Mike definitely pushed down on the significant bulge in the front of his pants.

We were all looking at each other with red, bleary eyes waiting for one of us to say something, when Mat said, “Damn Mike,” he slurred. It nearly made me laugh the difficulty Cam was having with his clearly dry mouth.  “You look like you have a really big, er…”

“Are you boys coming back for the fireworks, and desert?” Cam’s mum called out to us.

“Oh shit,” said First Mate Mike. And he jumped up.

“Yes, sure mum.” Cam kind of exhaled the words. He led the way like the confidant son not about to get into trouble for anything.

I followed Cam.

Mike followed me.

“Have you been burning your joss sticks again, Cam?” said Cam’s mum with a clear reference to Absolutely Fabulous. Cam had told me about his parents Absolutely Fabulous pot parties they used to have when Ab Fab was first on.

“Oh Jacob, I hope I won’t have to explain anything to your mother?” said Cam’s mum when she saw my bleary eyes.

“Take no notice of her,” said Cam. “She thinks she’s a comedian.

“Oh Mike, I see those boys have corrupted you too,” said Cam’s mum.

“Sorry Mrs H, really sorry, it won’t happen again.”

“Am I going to have to order you a blood test,” said Mrs H.

“Mum!” exclaimed Cam.

“You see, I can have a couple of sherries and be funny too,” said Mrs H.

“Did they do anything to you that you want to talk about?” Mrs H asked Mike.

“No, Mum, he’s coming back to you complete with all his juices,” said Cam.

“If I’d know you were out there alone with these two I’d have sent a rescue party,” said Mrs H.

“We didn’t even lick the back of his neck,” said Cam.

“I’d better go…” Mike started to say.

“Oh Mike, it’s New Year, relax,” said Mrs H. “Go and get some desert, before the first works starts.”

“He’s already had desert,” said Cam. He smiled broadly at his mother.

“That’s what I was worried about,” said Mrs H. “Get up there and get some cake.” She took Cam by the shoulders and pushed him towards the main cabin.


Then the fireworks started. First Mate Mike returned to the parent’s section. Cam and I took our place in the bow of the boat. The fireworks was spectacular. The colours were amazing, the noise was thrilling. I should have taken some photos, but I was too lost in the moment. They were fantastic, big and gay. Bang, bang, bang. Boom, boom, boom. We watched them explode over Victoria Harbour, stars that exploded and then exploded again and then exploded again. Rockets and reflecting across the water, quite beautifully, from the bow of Cam’s father’s boat. They were thrilling, quite amazing. 

Happy New Year.


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