Monday, 7 March 2011

Abortion





I've been reading stuff about abortion lately, none of which really made sense to me. It was all about the trauma and the unhappiness, but I never saw that amongst my friends who'd had abortions.

I've had a number of girlfriends who have had abortions, in fact, I think the majority, so I thought I'd ask them how they felt about it now.

Unanimously, they all said that it was the pregnancy that was the problem and not the abortion.

One said, she couldn't imagine being tied to the father of the child for the rest of her life because they'd had a baby together? She said that would have been the true nightmare. Now she is married to a partner she loves with who she has had children and life couldn't be better.

One said, she wasn't ready at the time, and a termination made so much sense. It would have been such a trial to complete uni and live her early twenties with a child. She so wasn't ready when she was found herself pregnant.

Now she has a beautiful son and she doesn't ever think about that first time. She has never had any regrets.

Another friend said, she never thought about it. She never wanted children. It was easier than having her appendix removed, she said. Quicker recovery time.

Another friend said, a problem? No. Why do you ask? It's not exactly like human beings are in short supply on this planet, now are they.

I've been reading about the pain an abortion creates, I told her.

No, it was the smartest thing for me to do, at that time. I never think about it now. It wasn't a problem. In and out in no time. She laughed. I think I was out dancing the next night.

Another girlfriend said, maybe if she'd already had children? Maybe? It may have played on her mind, picturing if they'd turn out like the others. But, she had her kids quite a few years after that and she never really connect the two. It was just something she didn't want at the time.

All of them said it wasn't a huge drama. They decided to go ahead with it and they did. All of them said the drama was the unplanned pregnancy, not the unplanned abortion.

They all said they were pleased that they had that option.

"You just fix it and move on," said J. "It is as simple as that."

"No regrets?"

"No."

“No need for forgiveness?”

“No, that is only for people who think life is outside of them.”

“What do you mean?”

“This is life, being lived.” 

“Not some promise of the future?”

“No, this is what life is, real decisions about your future.”

“Not some vague ideal to live up to because you may get a reward when you are dead?”

“Of all things?”

“I know.”

“I know, who still believes this shit?”

“It was okay when we were illiterate goat herders, but it just means you are, you know, I mean what else would you call it, mentally if you still believe it today.”

“So many people say they believe there is something, but they couldn’t say what?”

“Oooooooooo.”

“So many people say there is a force, a power, but they don’t know what.”

“Oooooooooo.’

“It’s pathetic.”

“It’s cowardice.”

“You can’t have a two way bet.”

“Make a decision. There is nothing after this. There is no higher power. That is just ludicrous.”


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