Approx 10% Gay?

Kinsey said that any given point in time, he estimated that approx 10% of the population is gay. Ever since those with Jesus in their lives have been trying to get that percentage down to 1%, or closer to it. You see, if there are fewer gay people then the world doesn't have to make such a great allowance for them, therefore the God myths are, somehow, relatively of greater importance.

And now a days, when active Jesus devotees, and not just all those people who have no greater imagination than to call themselves what their parents, and their parents before them called themselves, measure approx. 8% of the population, the actual figure becomes important, well, more so in the god botherers heads than anybody else’s, you understand.

It is, actually, mean spirited, really. The practice of taking other people down to make yourself look better. Blowing out the candle of others to give your own candle more oxygen with which to burn brighter. It is not loving your fellow man, it is not treating others as you would wish to be treated, so how Christian really are all of those Christians, I ask you?

But, what those with Jesus in their hearts – you know where the love ought to be, shame they lose sight of this – are trying to prove is that there are more straight boys, that a greater proportion of men are straight than, perhaps, there really is. What they fail to grasp is that a huge percentage of the hetro male population engage in gay sex. 

There is a spectrum along which we all fit. So, even if 10% are exclusively gay, there is another 10% that are 25% gay, then there is another 10% who are 50% gay, then there is another 10% who are 75%, then you have your 100% straight guys.

(I'm only using these numbers for illustrative purposes, I am not claiming they are 100% accurate)

All men are capable of gay sex, because they are sexual beings who like sex. They are capable of having sex with each other, and they often do. They just don't talk about it, don’t make it known.

I think Kinsey's estimate is, actually, kind of low.

I love all of the straight boys I have had sex with. They are good at it and enthusiastic too. They generally know exactly what they are doing because they are men too and they know what to do. It is not a mystery to them. And they are generally keen because it is only sex they are after.

They just want to fuck, and when they just want to fuck, they are not thinking about anything else. They are just thinking about sex, and they just do it, no more thought really required. And because they just want to fuck, they are into it. Do you understand what I am saying? There is no longer gay, or straight, at that point, there is just sex, two people wanting to have sex, wanting to have sex with each other, and that’s what happens.

No more inhibitions, what they want has been negotiated and accepted, no more holding back, all parties agree.

In the party scene when we were all in our twenties, straight boys engaged in a lot of gay sex, for different reasons. They were suitably inhibition free after taking pills and powders all night. And their gay mates are available. They were drunk, alcohol gets their pants off, yes it does. They hadn’t scored with a girl. Contrary to popular belief, gay bars/parties are not good places to pick up chicks. You know what gay bars/parties are good for? Picking up guys. And here is one that the prudes have real trouble with, straight boys like gay sex. 

Some straight guys just don’t listen to the status quo and they like getting off. It is easy. They were horny. The other guy was available. Gay guys are up for it. It was just sex and it was no big deal. They liked getting fucked in the arse because, you know, girls couldn’t do that for them. And gay guys were cool with just having sex and going their separate ways. Gay guys don’t expect him to call them afterwards.

I’ve heard one straight guy say, “I just liked the equal and same strength battling with me for dominance. It was a real turn on to see who was going to end up on top when we made out.”

Another one said a similar thing. “I got turned on by not knowing who was going to pin who down.”

Another straight guy once told me, “You know, gay guys are just really up for it, there’s no bullshit. No endless negotiation.”

Another said to me, “You guys suck good cock.”

There was lovely Simon, who was between girlfriends, who was really sensuous, was a great kisser, who fell asleep holding my hand covered in our cum. In the morning he was up early, he made me coffee, told me he had the best time. “Why?” I asked.

“It was easy, like there was no expectations,” he said. “It was just sex for fun, I really liked it.” 

“Sex for fun,” I said.

“Yep,” he said. “There should be more of it.”

“You wanna do it again.”

“Yeah, sure. Some day.”

“With me?”

“Of course, with you.”

Simon and I met at uni, first day. He was from the country, so everything was new to him. 

He’d split from his girlfriend to come to Melbourne to come to uni, she didn’t want him to go, she wanted him to stay in Dubbo and be a farmer.

“What more do you have,” she said. “You have it all here.”

“I wanna see the world,” said Simon. “Or at least, more than Dubbo.”

The girlfriend wasn’t too please. “My biological clock is ticking,” she said.

“You are 21 years old?”

“I know. That is what I am saying?”

We discovered things together, that is what 1st year is like. 

He discovered beer, but I wasn’t so keen.

I discovered ecstasy, and we were both pretty keen. We went to dance parties and danced. Girls liked him, I’m not sure I liked that. Girls didn’t like me so much, well, that’s what I thought. 

“They like you okay,” said Simon. “It’s you who doesn’t seem to like them.”

We discovered dancing. We both liked that.

Late, one night, we were really out of it. It was really late. We were sitting out the back of some warehouse, where the sun was about to come up. I just had the urge. I couldn’t stop myself. You know, 2 e’s in. I cuddled up to him. He was warm. He put his arm around me. And kissed the side of my head.

We both closed our eyes, there in each other’s warmth. Momentarily. I don’t know what Simon was thinking, but I know what I imagined.

“I love you,” I said. I’m not really sure where that came from, the drugs, of course.

“I love you too,” he said. He hugged me tight.

I hugged him. My hands began to feel him, his size, his strength.

Simon had sandy hair and a great smile. He had a well developed chest and a narrow waist. He had thick thighs and a beefy butt.

He jumped up. “Come on.” He held his hand out.

“What?” I took his hand.

“Come dance.”

We took another pill and danced until the sun came up and the music stopped.

We got back to my place. I don’t remember how we started kissing, but we did. We tore each other’s clothes off and had hot, drugged out sex. Simon was no inhibited.

I remember his torso covered in both our cum before we both passed out.

Sometime Sunday afternoon I woke up. Simon was sitting on the bed naked sipping coffee. “Good morning sleepy head,” he said. He handed me a coffee.

“You awake.”

“Yep.”

“How long have you been awake.”

“A while.”

“You should have woken me up.”

“You looked so peaceful.”

“What have you been doing?”

“Thinking.”

“Thinking about what?”

“Stuff. Lots of stuff. You? What we did. How beautiful the morning is. It is quiet here.”

“Regrets?”

“What? With you?”

“Yeah?”

“No, none.”

“None?”

“No, I liked it.”

“You liked it?”

“Yeah, sure. It was easy. It was fun.”

“You wanna do it again?”

Simon looked at me and smiled. “Finish your coffee.” He smiled. “Tiger.” He laughed.

“Have you ever…”

“No.”

“Never?”

“No,” he said. “I do it again, though.”

“With me?”

“Of course, with you.”

“Oh, good,” I said. I wanted to do it again with him.

We went out and had lunch at a café around the corner from my place. Simon had a big breakfast, but only really picked at it. I have mushrooms on toast, which sound like a good idea until they were sitting in front of me.

We drank coffee.

“So,” said Simon as we sat there. “You want to be boyfriends?”

“You and me?”

“Yes, you and me.”

“You know that would mean more…”

“Sex?”

“Yes.”

“Sure.” He smiled that smile that made even the greyest day sunnier. “But, I like being with you. All of you.”

“I do too.”

“You know what I really liked?” 

“What?”

“When you took my hand and we held hands walking onto the dance floor.”

I could still remember Simon’s big hand in mine. Warm and strong.

“I felt like someone,” he said. “I felt like…” He screwed up his face in thought. “Like I belonged… in that… and it felt good.”

Wow. I wasn’t expecting any of that. I wasn’t expecting to have sex with him either, not at all.

“So, you wanna be gay.”

“No.”

“Boyfriends kind of means that.”

“Why?”

“Because we are two guys.”

“Can't a straight guy and a gay guy be in love with each other?”

Now we were in love. This was going fast, more than fast, it was going places I never thought about. “Um.” I shrugged. “Yes.” I sat back in my chair and looked at Simon. “I guess.”

“Then, that’s what we are.”

“Hard to explain to other people.”

“Why so?”

“They won’t understand.”

“Who cares if they do,” said Simon. “But, I reckon they will understand by seeing us.”

“I guess.”

Simon drank his coffee.

“Is this too much?” He smiled.

Too much. It was too much, really. But it felt deliciously too much.

“You are not answering?” said Simon.

What the fuck. I wish it was me who had the guts to just say it and not let doubts stop me.

“You are still not answering?”

“My head is spinning,” I said. “But it is spinning in a good way.”

Simon reached across the table and took my hand. “My head is spinning too,” he said.

So, for the rest of first year, we had quite an intense relationship. Simon telling anyone who asked that he was straight, me telling them I was gay. That led to quite a few conversations, not that either of us cared. Oh, I guess we cared because it was about us.

The sociology students wanted to study us. I think some of them did unofficially.

Gay guys wanted to get with us. Straight guys were fascinated and had lots of questions.

Over the first year holidays, Simon met Tessa down at Lorne with his family. He told her all about me. Tessa didn’t like me, she could barely conceal her dislike for me.

She asked me what my intensions were. “What do you think is going to happen, from here?” And, I remember hoping the earth would just open up and swallow her right at that moment.

It’s okay, you have him. I knew this day would come one day, I am not stupid, but you don’t have to gloat. “I don’t have any expectations,” I said. A gracious exit, I thought. Set them free, and all that.

Simon and I drifted apart. And that was that. We remained friends for the rest of uni, but started mixing in different circles. Simon got all sporty and joined the sporty guys.

And me. Well? I kind of got through uni on my own, after that, with a few friends. Uni was never the great big, social experiment that others had, well, not after Simon. It was pretty tame, post Simon. It wasn’t until I got a job and threw myself into the gay scene that I found my group and my place in the world.