Taoism: Shit happens
Buddhism: If shit happens, it really isn’t shit
Hinduism: This shit has happened before
Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah
Catholicism: Shit happens because you deserve it
Protestantism: Work harder, or shit will happen
Materialist: Whoever dies with the most shit, wins!
Atheist: I can’t believe this shit
Militant Agnostic: I don’t know shit & neither do you!
Judaism: Why does shit always happen to us?
Eco-Spiritual: Compost Happens. It’s all good shit.
Rastafarianism: Let’s smoke this shit!
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